Friday, April 22, 2011

The Vampire Relationship Guide Tour!


Today is my day to have author Evelyn Lafont here during her blog tour for Vampire Relationship Guide! This book is just hilarious! You can find my review just one post below this one. Check out this guest post from the author herself:

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From Paranormal to Parahormonal

Okay, I don’t want to tell you how old I am, but I do want to say this: When I was a kid, most paranormal books didn’t have romance in them, they had death, attempted murder, spooks, and big ol’ houses built on ancient Indian burial grounds.

But some time during the late 1990’s to early 2000’s, the paranormal genre—that one which had previously featured scary paranormal goons ready to feast on your eyeballs and kick you out of their ancestral homes—moved into a whole new realm that I like to refer to as parahormonal. In the parahormonal genre, the big scary goons added a whole heap of sexy to their plate and made us normal chicks want to run screaming right into their arms, instead of away from them.

Luckily, this shift was completely innocent and had no victims…right? Okay, yeah, it definitely did. You wanna know who?

Mortal men.

When romance was a little less imaginative, regular old dudes had half a chance of keeping up with our alpha male heroes. But now? Oh, nuh-uh, men are so screwed. Let me tell you, if my husband tries to bite my neck during sex, I can pretty much guarantee I’m going to get really pissed off and that’s probably going to be a mood kill.

In addition to not being able to bite me like the heroes of my favorite paranormal romance novels bite their heroines, my husband also cannot defend me against a werewolf attack, fly, read my mind, invade my dreams to some sexy end, take me to an anti-gravity plane for anti-gravity sex, and so on.

So paranormal romance lovers, give your insignificant other a little extra lovin’ today to show him or her how much you appreciate his or her insufficient and pathetic attempts at sexing you up. Then, go open up your favorite paranormal romance novel and commence to swooning.




Evelyn Lafont is an author and freelance writer with an addiction to Xanax and a predilection for snark. Her debut novella, The Vampire Relationship Guide, Volume 1: Meeting and Mating is available on Amazon , Barnes and Noble and Smashwords .




Visit The Bookish Snob Promotions to find out what other stops are along this tour:
The Bookish Snob Promotions


EXCITING NEWS!

For those following this tour, Evelyn is giving away an AMAZING opportunity for one lucky reader -

The chance to be a BETA READER for her
next installment of this fun series!

(For those unsure what a beta reader is, you get a sneak read BEFORE the book is released!)

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Thank you for being here Evelyn, and I really enjoy your take on the parahormonal :)

8 comments:

  1. OMGSH! Seriously can't breath for laughing! That is so true - our men can't possibly measure up to the sexy alphas in the books we read. Think also for the poor suckers who's women love Highlanders! I think it's the fantasy of it all, that makes it so exciting but I will say this.. a little biting during sex.. what's wrong with that? LOL

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  2. That really does set the bar high for our men!!! I couldn't get mine to were a kilt or fangs...so I guess I will have to leave those things to my imagination.

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  3. Um, I think I could get mine to wear a kilt...after all, I did buy the hula skirt and coconut bra he requested.

    Thanks for having me Tishia! Also, I wanted to let your readers know that if they buy The Vampire Relationship Guide Volume 1 on Smashwords Easter weekend they can get 35% off with code TE72R http://bit.ly/gR9t2T

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  4. LOL! Great post! I love swooning over those hot guys...(AND my hubby!) haha
    The Delusional Diaries

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  5. Thanks Lacey :-)

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  6. When I was married, My hubby used to reap in the benefits of me reading these books though then I read mainly historicals. I always wondered if it been different if I read paranormal's then??

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  7. Thank you Evelyn! That's very generous of you :)

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  8. Lol, probably not BLHmistress. Honestly, these books can serve as awesome foreplay no matter what genre you read--and that sure does benefit mortal men ;-P

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